i am really worried about a lot of things. this really isn't a private enough place to talk about them. but whoever is reading this it's likely that you would care, and i appreciate that.

tonight i had to make a very uncomfortable decision, which hurt someone. and i was fair and tried as hard as i could not to hurt that person to as much extent as i could seeing that i couldn't give in the way they needed. in doing so i believe i may've created an barrier that we can't cross.

in many ways it feels like a personal defeat to me. i wanted to believe in the chance of something more, but part of me doesn't really believe i can do it, and the other part is mad when someone is perceptive enough to mention it. but i really was trying the very most i could, and on that point i am unwaivering.

why am i writing this in a journal instead of talking to this person? because i have nothing more to say. it's all the same things with many different faces. it's sad when you realize things like this about yourself.

listening to: amel larrieux - "weary"
Weary

Add to My Profile | More Videos