it's just after 8 AM and i'm up. it's ok because i have class at 9:25, but it felt important to note.

had a fantastic time last night with chad. we went to usual suspects and had some drinks and talked for a few hours. it was really nice to get away from everything and just laugh. that sounds way like i'm in an institution or something, and i've been let out on my free day, but it was not meant that way.

i had a tiny bit of work i was supposed to do for my class this morning but it didn't really get done, because i am always in favor of sleep rather than work. surprised? you shouldn't be. who are you and where did you come in? hahaha. but it's not a big deal. it's not a turned in thing or anything.

meanwhile it is scary crunch time (god i hate that expression) on the school front. physics is gonna be the worst. i have so much to work on for it. i'm devising a plan of action though. and truthfully, if everything doesn't get done, my life will continue. i've been less than extraordinary before, and i'm ok with it. but i'd like to get as much of it done as i can. which may possibly mean that i might randomly mention physics stuff if i'm in your presence. don't take it personally, and know that i'm ok behind all of it. it's a temporary insanity of sorts. in addition to that i have to start (oh yes i said start) on my marketing research project. i'm doing diesel jeans so it'll be fun, except my teacher is a hella cranky old man and who knows if my paper will be good enough for him. we'll just have to see. it's a shame because i was hoping that would be my favorite class but circumstances have unfolded otherwise to say the very least. need to start studying for my art history exam and making notecards as well. and that leaves finance class. i have no idea what all kinda miracles need to aid me in doing well in that class. our exam is cumulative essentially, so i need to turn back time cyndi lauper style and basically have a second round of classes to understand everything. i hope it'll be ok. as long as i get a C i'm gonna be thrilled. it's a whole class about being smart with money... if there were ever a class further from my nature i have not heard of it. who knows... but that being said if you happen upon my angel of mercy, please direct him or her to me with a quickness.

i'm feeling very confused and disillusioned about school and my life in a lot of ways right now, and can rest comfortably in the fact that i will make probably the wrong decisions in dealing with it all. more and more it all feels like a mistake to be in this degree, but even with this one that i've stuck with for a long time now i have 3 more semesters, which will make a total of 5 as a senior! that is ungodly! so changing it again is absolutely out of the question. i'm just feeling restless and it's making everything feel like a monumental pain in my ass.

this summer better be good. because this school year has been rough. there have been many good parts, too, but i'm ready for a much deserved break. also i really need to start going to the gym or something, because i'm feeling some type of way about all that right now. and most likely anything would help some, even if i will never look like i would like to look.

there's so many things to think about and to take on. there need to be like 3 or 4 of me to work all this out. however it's just me. so things are probably not gonna go down exactly as planned, and all i can say about that at this stage in the game is "so what?" slightly apathetic, i realize but what am i supposed to do? i mean i'd like to sleep ALL DAY today but i'm awake and going to finance class which is so long and painful, especially at this hour, and have a plan of action for getting things done this week. i feel that's all that can be asked of me, and anyone that has a problem with that can take their proper place at the back of the complaint line, and i will get to you when i feel like it. but that person is most likely me, so we'll see how i continue to work that problem out.

all that said, and since i cashed in my free day from the institution already this week, a bitch needs to get ready for class (scared face).

and in the spirit of confession and honesty, i have been slightly obsessed with this song in a closeted fashion, so i think it's fair that i should put it out there. it's fun, just remember that, and yeah, here it is:

Conceited

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on that note, i'ma go.